


Sometimes You'll Succeed

by Corvus_florensis



Category: The Last of Us (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, One Shot, Spoilers, TLOU2 spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:29:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25789627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Corvus_florensis/pseuds/Corvus_florensis
Summary: Joel's last thoughts as he faces his reckoning.
Relationships: Ellie & Joel (The Last of Us)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	Sometimes You'll Succeed

Once she was in the room, everything else just started to slowly faded away.

He could hear her crying and screaming, screaming _his name_ , and goddamn, he missed hearing her say his name. It’s been so long. So long since they had a meaningful conversation, so long since they talked to each other about the things that mattered…

“I don’t think I can ever forgive you for that.” He knew. Ever since he saw her at the hospital two years ago, he knew there was no coming back. Not from the things he did. The lies he told. The amount of suffering he put her through. But even then, these words hurt.

Now, well, his whole body hurt. he could not move an inch, even when he heard her crying for him to get up. All he could do was stare at her, waiting for the next blow. He wished he could still talk, that the words in his mouth could get out and not be drowned in the gurgle of blood in his throat. _It’s okay. Please don’t remember me this way. Please, just look away, please…_ He didn’t know what would come next, didn’t know what she would do once this was over ( _will it ever be over?_ ), but he wished he could tell her to look away.

But then, a selfish part of him was strangely glad that she was there. That she was there to remind him… _“If somehow the Lord gave me a second chance at that moment, I would do it all over again”_ Whatever he did to deserve this, it was worth it.

He remembers watching from afar, the night before. The way she seemed so carefree, as she laughed and smiled and got flustered. All of these little things that he recalled right now, in an instant of time… they were worth it. She was worth it.

As the golf club came crashing down, there was only one thing in his mind.

  
“I don’t think I can ever forgive you for that. _But I would like to try._ ”   
  
Yeah. He'd like that.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Pearl Jam's "Future Days".


End file.
